Forgive Me, Forgive Me Not
by Tokyo Rabbit
Summary: Bunny flees the life she’s always known to protect Darien from self-destruction. Self-destruction from what? A secret that would make him throw away his dreams in an instant. Can he forgive her for the ultimate betrayal when he finds her? MUSHY
1. Stealing Away into the Night

_ Tr- Got the idea from I'm not sure where. Just outa thin air I guess.   
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* _**

**

Forgive Me  
Forgive Me Not  
~*~  
I  
Stealing into the Night  
*  
_Tokyo Rabbit  
*_

Looking across the table, Darien smiled softly at his fiancée who all throughout their date seemed extremely thoughtful. He had tried to coax her into telling him what was burdening her so obviously, but she just smiled and winked saying that it was nothing but tests coming up that were occupying her mind that night. 

"I'll help you study then," he leaned across the table and placed his warm hand upon her soft one. 

She smiled at him, however the show of happy emotion never quite reached her eyes, "I'd like that." 

His smoky grin faltered for only one second, not unnoticed by her. Something hung thickly in the air like Death, causing the atmosphere surrounding the lovers to be tense and unnatural. Bunny was hiding something, Darien knew that much, but what was it? Was she fighting with the girls? No, that couldn't be it. Perhaps she sensed some great evil brooding in over the horizon, but if that were the case he would as well. He hated it when secrets came in between them, even if it made a hypocrite for thinking so; there was plenty an occasion where he kept something important from her that really only hindered the solution from appearing than helping. 

She excused herself from the table, smoothed the unseen wrinkles in her black, sleekly styled dress and walked to the restrooms. When she closed the stall door behind her, her body came immediate contact with the cool metal door as she leaned against it in an act of desperation. This was the last night with the love of her life for who knew how long and she was ruining it. The burden of her life-altering secret was weighing down upon her heart like a mountain of boulders. Her body shook as she suppressed her sobs at the thought of having to leave him, but it was the only way. Darien's dreams were important to her and if she told him the secrets she withheld, he would toss them aside like yesterday's paper and never look back on them. Bunny knew that much, so as to protect their future and his happiness she had to leave. 

Slowly she sunk to the floor along the chilled door. Putting her pretty head in her pretty hands she tried to put every thought that was even remotely depressing behind her. _'Make it special, make it special,'_ she repeated over and over again in her head as if sending a prayer to the Moon Goddess, her mother, and the God above her. Taking deep breaths, she stood on shaky knees and slowly opened the door to give herself a look over in the lavatory mirror. The labor she exerted from keeping herself from tears was apparent. 

Bunny opened her tiny black purse and pulled out a small compact of powder, puffed some of the substance over the blotchy parts of her face, replied her lipstick, placed disheveled parts of her cream hair back into place, tugged on her dress here and there, and she was ready to return to the table. Heaving a great sigh, she imagined putting a mask of elation over the face of utter despair she currently wore. It was usually Darien protecting her from something, not the other way around. She didn't know how he did it. 

Walking out with a radiant smile on her face, she pulled her mental resources on being a Princess to dazzle him with her sudden 'recovery.' Looking up, he saw her and smiled as she waved cutely at him. Only God knew how much she loved him, no, that would lead to thoughts of leaving him again. Too late. 

He stood like the gentleman he truly was and pulled out her chair for her. When they got settled again, she smiled at him again, "I love you Darien." 

His lips quirked as he gave her a handsome smile in wonder from where that sudden sentiment came from, "I love you too, Buns." 

The eerie mood that seemed to keep their company earlier thinned and dissipated all together as they began to carry a light and natural conversation with them. Their food came shortly after.

~*~  


"What is it? You've been staring at me all night," Darien quipped when he shut his apartment door behind him as they entered the small condo. 

"Just admiring you," Bunny winked as she plopped down on the couch. 

"Is that so?" He grinned sitting next to her. 

"Yes. Is it a crime to check you out once in a while? It's just a small reminder that I'm engaged to the most handsome man in all of the Galaxies," she pouted playfully as he kissed her bare shoulder. 

"Well, soon I'll have my doctrines and we'll be wed. You can admire me all you want then," he growled, nibbling on her ear. 

She huffed, "You conceited jerk. I swear. Besides, why can't I do it now?" 

"Because," he kissed her full on the mouth, "I have other plans." 

Keeping her from protesting, he wrapped an arm around her waist and laid her back, kissing her soundly over and over again with a passion that made her giggle as she realized his intentions. Between kisses and giggling she breathed out, "I need to--call my mother--and tell--her-- I'm staying at a friends-" 

Bunny fumbled for the phone on the long, wooden coffee table while her lover moved down to speckle her silken neck and collarbone with kisses. 

"Hi Mom--yeah, tee-hee. Yeah, I'm fine. I'm going to stay at a friend's house, okay? Sure, see, hee, you in the morning. Love you." 

Click. 

Irene Tsukino hung up the phone and shook her head as she deleted the latest call from caller ID:

**Chiba, Darien**

Didn't her daughter know of the little box's function? As always when her only daughter called from that particular number, she prayed to the Heavens above for the couple's safety from whatever twists and surprises Fate had in store for them. 

"Honey, was that Bunny?" Irene heard her husband call from the kitchen. 

"Yes dear," she answered as she returned to the supper table. 

"Is she still out with that boy?" Ken asked angrily as Sammy rolled his eyes at his father's usual antics. 

"No dear, she's staying at Rei's," Irene sat back down to her dinner almost sadly, _'Please Lord, protect them.'_

~*~  


Bunny's eyes flew open as the Moon filtered in through the patio curtains and warmed her skin in a way only her mother star could do. Carefully she slid out from underneath the strong arm that embraced her in slumber. Shivering slightly, she got dressed quickly and looked upon her sleeping lover. She smiled as her eyes adjusted to the silvery darkness. Darien always looked like a boy when he slept, that was one thing she adored about him. 

Before she walked out of the bedroom, she contemplated on whether or not she should give him a goodbye kiss as there was a slight chance of him waking. After a few moments of silent deliberation, she decided to risk it, as he was quite exhausted. She made sure it would be that way for when it was time for her to leave. 

Tiptoeing over to his designated side of the bed she leaned over and pulled back her hair. Her lips came in contact with his softly in sweet bliss. Their last kiss in years, or possibly forever. A silver tear escaped her left eye and she had to stand and catch it quickly before it landed on his iron figure. 

Not delaying a moment more, she stealthily moved through the darkened apartment, grabbed her black heals, unlocked the door, opened it, and stepped out into the building hallway. However, before she closed the door behind her, she whispered into the slumbering chambers, "I love you, Endymion." 

And with that, she closed it silently and locked it behind her as her only love stirred in the bed they often shared with one another.

~*~  


Looking upon the two-story house where most of her memories and years had been made and spent, she was beginning to second-guess herself. Was this the right thing to do, or was there another solution that she was over looking? No, she saw no other way. Weeks of pondering over her dilemma had proved that. 

Hopping with angelic ease over the stone fence--a product of years of being a Soldier--she ran through her backyard and then flew to the highest branch on the Maple tree that grew in her back yard. Sliding her window open, she slipped inside easily, only almost tripping once. Quietly she searched her closet for her luggage and began to pack all of her necessities: clothes, hygiene products, the money she had saved up over a long period of time, a few personal things, photographs, and so on. 

Before she hauled the suitcases to her window to drop them to the soft ground below, she looked at the sleeping figure on her bed. Luna... her best friend and confidant for as long as she could remember. _'Forgive me for this Luna,'_ Bunny thought and let the luggage drop. 

Hopping down afterwards, she landed perfectly and then tossed the normally impossible to toss objects over the fence. 

"Watch it Dumpling Head!" A voice hissed from the other side. 

Lifting herself up with heart racing, she looked over the stone to see a priestess mere inches away from where her bags had landed, "Sorry Rei." 

The fiery Shinto girl began to pick the immense baggage up, "Let's just get going." 

Nodding, Bunny hoisted herself the rest of the way over and helped her friend. They walked in awkward silence for a couple blocks distance in a sad way. They finally reached a bench on a corner; sitting the bag she held down, Rei exhaled, "Geez, with the way you pack, you'd think you were going away forever." 

Looking up, her violet eyes widened as she saw a silver stream pouring from each of Bunny's eyes. Quickly reprimanding herself, she placed calloused, but delicate hands on her friend's shoulders, "Hey, it's not forever, Bunny. It's only for a couple of years, right?" 

The blonde nodded slowly and tried vainly to brush away her tears, "Yes, that's right." 

"And the girls and I will be there for the big event, okay? I promise on my mother star," Rei smiled kindly, "Not to mention, you call for anything, understand? And I mean anything!" 

Without another word, Bunny launched herself in Rei's arms, sobbing, "I love you Rei." 

The priestess' arms hesitantly wrapped around the sobbing figure, "I--I love you too...." 

"Tell everyone I send my love," the princess sobbed. 

"I will--" 

Their sentiments were cut short by the bus pulling up to the stop. Bunny quickly fished a silver palm-sized mirror out of her purse and handed it to her friend, "Lock this away for me?" 

The girl nearly had to shove it in her friend's hands as the brunette looked upon it sadly, hands outstretching slightly. They both knew that if Rei took it, Bunny's life link with Darien would be blocked. If she took it, the prince wouldn't be able to feel his lover's existence, wouldn't be able to contact her through their dreams, or feel her emotions. In other words, he wouldn't be able to find her, which was exactly what she wanted. However, during her whole time of absence, she would be able to feel him and contact him if need be. In a way it was torturous but it would keep her going when the times would get tough, and they most definitely would. Pouring that power into a possession of Bunny's would enable that act to be passed. 

Rei took it and jammed it into her red and white robes, "Are you not going to tell him at all?" 

"No, not until this is done and over with," Bunny stated firmly. 

The Shinto girl admired her friend for this bout of strength; she tried to imagine herself in her princess' place, but it could not be done. 

Rei helped her on the bus with her baggage and much to the traveler's dismay, paid her bus fair. Which reminded her.... Fishing into her vast pockets, the Martian princess pulled out a parcel and handed it to Bunny who looked up at her in wonder from her seat, "Grandpa and I have raised some money for you. We know that your budget will be tight enough as it is moving out on your own...." 

Bunny hesitantly took it and then jammed it into the small duffle bag that sat next to her. She knew better than to refuse something so great from the priestess. It was a kind act and it would dishonor Rei if it was not accepted. 

"Call me when you arrive," was all the Soldier of Fire said before she stepped off the bus. 

Driving away to her new life, Bunny waved for as long as possible to her dear friend and fought back the tears sure to come until she could be seen no more. 

Rei's trek home was miserable. She had just committed an act of treason for letting her princess out of the Soldiers' range, but there was nothing to do to change the fact that she was leaving. She reached her temple as the moon began to droop near the night's horizon. Walking into the room where the Sacred Fire was constantly burning, she fished out the small mirror as an idea of where to hide it came to mind. 

Shoving it into its resting place for the next couple of years, the link from Bunny to Darien broke. After doing so, she prayed for her best friend's safety through her tears.

~*~  


Darien's eyes flew open instantly. Something wasn't right. Rolling over he found Bunny to be gone. Donning some boxers, he walked to the kitchen to see if she had gotten up to raid, he found her not. Walking back to his room, he looked for some sign that she was in the bathroom, but found none. 

The Moon's silver light filtered into the room in a perfect beam and just like magic, small diamond-like particles began to manifest and swirl gently where the light hit on his nightstand. Slowly an envelope appeared. Picking it up, he recognized the silvery blue writing to be Bunny's. It was addressed to him. He tore it open and read frantically by the Moon's giving light but could not believe what he read. 

Falling back onto the bed, he sat reading it once more to see if his eyes were not playing tricks upon him. The second read though proved what he had feared he had seen. 

Heart plummeting, he crumpled the letter slightly and ran his free hand through his untamed hair, "She's gone...."

_ *====================================  
Wee! What could Bunny's big secret be? And how will everyone react when they get their letters via-moonlight? Wee! Find out in the next chapter.  
~ TR  
6.14.03  
(unedited) _


	2. Reason

_TR- With only one week to go from FF's shutdown, I'm trying to decide on which stories to update. I wonder how long it'll take until my fellow authors and I are able to update again. Who knows.... And also, please don't hate me for putting poor Darien through the wringer. I promise to make up for it with an euphoria of love.  
_ *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

** Forgive Me  
Forgive Me Not  
~*~  
II  
Reason  
*  
**_ Tokyo Rabbit_  
*

Rei had been sweeping in the same sport for over two hours. She had woken with dawn, only sleeping for an hour or so, and began her chores for the day in a zombie-like state. The most she moved from her spot was when Phobos, one of her guardian crows, came swooping down to deliver a letter she had clasped in her beak. The priestess reached up to catch the envelope as it fluttered down to her. Opening it, two crows-one of them having previously delivered the letter their princess held-perched on her shoulders to read along. 

Rei, having read it, ignited the paper with a thought. The weight on her shoulders lifted, "So you let her go?" 

She turned solemnly to look at the twins that now stood behind her. Her look of absolute misery told them enough. 

"You know that the others will question your motivation," Deimos, the second woman, stated. 

"And possibly put you on trial for treason," Phobos concluded her sister's statement. 

"Yes, I know," Rei replied. 

**_*Caw!*_**

The priestess turned to see who was ascending the temple steps; she knew that the others were receiving their letters similar ways and that they would probably congregate at the shrine, but so soon? 

The site she saw as the figure came into view broke her heart; dark circles under cobalt blue eyes, pale skin, ebony hair flying untamed in every direction, wrinkled pants, an un-tucked shirt that matched nothing they were wearing, and a look of utter desperation. It was Darien's body, but his whole spirit and life seemed to have left him to leave only a walking shell. He stopped in front of her, eyes gazing mournfully at her. 

What she heard next was something that she would have rather jumped off a cliff than heard, "Why?" 

His voice broke and no sooner than the word was spoken, he sunk to the ground. The Shinto priestess, so cold and proud, fell to her knees as well and cradled the man, unknowing what to say to him. She knew why, but to tell him would mean treason against her princess. Rei had already committed one crime; let her not have another on her conscious, even if it meant betraying her prince and watching him crumble. 

~*~ 

Bunny felt like hell as she stirred awake, a chore in itself. Her red eyes came open with great labor, as she had cried herself to sleep the night before and her body felt like a ton of lead. Wishing nothing more than to fall back asleep and never wake up again, she tried to pinpoint what had caused her to wake in the first place. She inhaled and smelt the most wonderful smell in the whole entire world: breakfast. 

Moving her sore limbs, she climbed off of the air mattress in her room and into the kitchen; a very short trip indeed. Sitting at the kitchen table, she squinted through her blurry vision at a woman humming at the stove. She had long coal hair that fell in soft clouds down her back. It was up in a style that mirrored Bunny's in that it had two buns on top but instead of two ponytails, the rest flowed freely. The young woman's hair was only one thing she could truly make out, well, that and her tail that was swinging contently in time with her humming. 

"Here, eat." The woman said as she sat a plate in front of Bunny. 

"Thanks Luna," the blonde mumbled as she took the fork and knife previously sat out in hand. 

A moment when by before Bunny sat bolt upright in her seat, "Luna?!" 

The girl smirked at her, hands on hips, "Yes, and?" 

"How did you find me?!" 

"I'm a cat, give me some credit!" Luna scolded, waving a spatula at her friend, "Unforgivable, Tsukino Bunny! Sneaking out at night like that!" 

Returning to the sizzling stove, the woman who normally took the form of a cat resumed her chore in cooking breakfast. Still highly confused as to how her guardian cat found her and why she was in her natural form, Bunny looked down at the tantalizing breakfast and began to eat slowly until another realization sent her sputtering. 

Luna walked a mere four steps and pat her princess on the back, "You half way deserve that, leaving all of us behind. Not saying a word-" 

"Where did this table come from?!" The blonde shouted. Head snapping up, she saw in her living room a couch, coffee table and television, "Where did all of this stuff come from?!" 

Turning the stove off, Luna sat her own plate down across from her friend and stated huffily, "Did you expect me to let you live in a hell hole? For goodness sakes. Thought you knew me better." 

Head whirling, Bunny felt her stomach take a sickening lurch, "Oh...." 

The brunette woman watched sympathetically as her long-time friend ran to where she suspected the bathroom to be. The first woman returned a few moments later, wiping her mouth off on her sleeve. Sitting down, she gave a curt, "Thanks Luna." 

"What are friends for?" She smiled. 

At this statement, Bunny broke down and began to sob again while Luna moved from her seat to comfort and hold her friend, "Shh.... Don't worry. I'm here, you're not alone. You don't have to face this alone, Bunny." 

It took a little while until the sobbing blonde calmed down enough to resume breakfast, "So how did you find me?" 

"I had noticed your strange behavior. I suspected what was wrong, but hearing you one night in the bathroom confirmed my suspicions," Luna paused, maroon eyes surveying the girl before her, "Why didn't you tell any of us you were pregnant?" 

"I wanted to!" She began in her defense, "But I just couldn't bring myself to.... Rei found out-I guess the same way you did and when I told her my plan, she agreed to help me." 

"Ah yes, your plan to leave behind everyone who will give you nothing but love and support. Were you afraid we would turn you away, Bunny, because you should know better than to think-" 

"No! That's not it!" She started again a little quieter, "I knew that there would be nothing but support from everyone, but I just couldn't bare telling Darien...." 

Luna had half way expected he didn't know, but hearing it admitted surprised her, "Bunny...! Darien doesn't even know?!" 

"No. He's the reason why I left," the expecting mother placed a hand on her stomach while smiling grimly, "It wasn't suppose to happen this way. Rini was supposed to be born while Darien and I ruled Earth, not while we were still trying to define who we are." 

"Pluto always told us that the future is uncertain..." Luna paused, "Bunny... you-you aren't regretting your pregnancy are you?" 

"No! I want this more than anything and I know that Darien does too, but Luna, he has dreams just like any normal human being, just like I do, but we aren't normal. Giving up his dreams and goals of becoming a doctor would devastate him, I know it. I want him to have that chance before our duty catches up with us, I want him to have that normal as long as possible." 

"But why run away without telling him?" 

"If I told him, he would throw away everything he's worked so hard for in life without a second glance just to be here for me and our baby. Sacrificing his happiness for something that wasn't suppose to happen yet... he would ruin himself." 

"What about the girls? Your family?" 

"I've sent them all letters explaining that I've left for a couple of years for personal reasons. Once Darien excepts that as the only reason for my leaving, Rei will fill in everyone else." 

"Everyone but Darien...." 

"Will know of Rini's birth...." Bunny finished, feeling more depressed than she had her whole life. 

Luna was about to scold her friend for being so foolish, that there must have been another way, but resolved to take the path that was chosen, "Fine, but don't blame me if something bad happens. Besides, I'm going to be an aunt!" 

That was the first genuine smile Luna had seen on Bunny's face for quite some time. It would be hard, just the two of them, but no matter what, Luna would take care of her princess and the child. 

~*~ 

"Why?!" Haruka pounded her fist into the table. 

Currently, every single member of the Sailor Soldiers (besides Rini of course) and Darien were sitting around a large table in the Hiwaka shrine. Rei sipped on her tea. To let Darien know (who was staring off into oblivion, looking like a lost little boy) was to commit a second act of treason, or technically third, the second being against her prince. 

"She just said she wanted to find out who she really is, but couldn't she do that here?" Ami sighed, placing her head in her hands. 

"I suppose she felt trapped some how," Rei suggested. 

"... it's my fault." Darien's horse voice made half the room jump, as it was the first time he had spoken since everyone met up at the shrine with their letters in hand. 

"No, it's not," the priestess stated firmly, "She wants to find herself by herself. Bunny loves us all, as we do her. To mope around and put an end to our daily lives would insult her and only trouble her." 

"It's not like she's not coming back," Mina said, perking up a little, "She promised to be away only for a little while." 

"Yeah, but why only take Luna with her?" Artemis placed a paw under his chin in thought. 

"Luna's with her?" Rei asked surprised. 

"No one could find her," Lita said, "So we figured Bunny took her along." 

"I had no idea...." 

"What I don't know about is why none of us knew this was going to happen." Michiru stated, turquoise eyes spanning across everyone. 

Rei took a guilty drink of her tea. 

"You know how she is, free spirit. No one can tell her no," Haruka sighed. 

"But what if she's in trouble? How can we protect her?" Lita asked, concern returning. 

"Tokyo is the main focus of Youma attacks due to it's high energy concentration," Ami said, "I doubt she'll run into anything-uh, where is she any ways?" 

The whole room looked around clueless, stating that their letters held no such information. 

"So we have no means to contact her?" Hotaru asked disbelieving. 

"Darien?" Setsuna asked quietly. 

"Our connection has been broken...." His weak response came. 

"So then she is in trouble!" Haruka's temper flared. 

Darien slumped over and placed his tired face in his desperate hands, "Bunny broke it. She doesn't want anyone to find her, including me!" 

Rei placed a sympathetic hand on his quavering shoulder. The meeting solemnly trudged on like that for a dreary eternity it seemed. Everyone agreed that it was best just to keep an ear out for Bunny if she tried to contact any of them and hope for the best. Darien looked as if he was about to jump off a bridge, but with some persuasion that she was fine and he wasn't the reasoning behind her leaving, his eyes brightened up only a small degree and told them that he would try his best to understand his lover's reason. Everyone leaving one by one, Michiru and Haruka lingered a little while longer. As Haruka began to desend the temple stairs, Michiru came up behind Rei and said, "You know where she's at." 

Rei didn't say anything, as she knew that the Soldier of the Deep Seas would know if the priestess tried to lie to her. 

"I hope your judgment will not land her in danger, or I will personally see to it that you're held accountable." And that was it. 

Rei watched her walk off to join her sulking lover. Was it a good idea to let Bunny leave? Or was there another way that could not be seen? For now, the Shinto girl resolved, it was the path to be taken. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 

_TR- Yay! It took me a total of 1-2 hours to write this. Hopefully it will take as quick to get the other chapters out. About the story.... I didn't realize it was a 'run away' story until I began to write this chapter. I always hate reading those stories where Darien and the girls have 'betrayed' Bunny/Serena so she runs away. They're just so 'boo-hoo! Feel sorry for me!' even if they aren't meant to be. So, I guess you could say this one is the opposite, Bunny 'betraying' Darien and the girls. But don't worry, all will turn out in the end.   
(unedited)   
7-15-03 _


End file.
